Dear Diary, I don’t watch the clock. I don’t want to  know when time has run out. Sometime I feel like I’m running from the inevitable , but inevitably the end will come .  I just don’t want it to come “too soon.” So I pray and prey, hoping that mercy will be bestowed. One [...]

she had this new found freedom , a pleasant lifelessness . she floated for a week . & her relationship w. him was good for once. no attitude no arguments . UNREAL . even in her adult age her mother demanded that she’d call when she got to her destination , previously she only requested [...]

I dream these things up and my mind so eloquently and by time I get to this screen I’ve forgotten: She’d called her girl at 11:45pm to wish her a Happy Birthday. It turned into a fun filled conversation as she strolled the store with her Chief. It was 12 and the store was closing and [...]

Dear Mister,  I find myself underneath you- Everyday. And if by some small chance I’m not, you’re in my ear.  I’m becoming the person I set out not to be. They say you can’t control your feelings and that maybe true but I’m trying my best to hold onto the reigns.  When and if I let go of [...]

I overstay my welcome, wishing that you’d tell me to leave. So that I will have to put on my shoes and walk out of your life forever. Craddling my heart on my sleeve, hoping it will ascend back into the cold confinds of my chest where a sea of emotionlessness drifts.. I loiter in [...]

I had to come “home” to get this stress of my chest. Day started off kinda rough. I got little to no sleep-  nothing out of the ordinary. Was late for work- as i am everyday. My sup did some dumb shit- only because she can get away with it. Then I call the collections [...]

(Google)  I dunno where this stems from but i happens a lil too often for my liking. Im totally unhappy with everything. I don’t like work, home, or anything. I feel as if I’m just existing.. like i have no purpose. This totally sucks. I feel like if i stay consistant with what I’m doing [...]

For the past few days i’ve been getting myself back together, emotionally. The pain of losing him that was making me sick is now fading; Slowly, but surely. But in one way or another I still have to deal with him; Cal, my favorite loser. We have business together && will have it for the [...]

I want you exclusive… [maybe] we should just do this, with a feeling so strong, how can we go wrong?   MTB4, That part of the song speaks to my heart. Thats how I feel about Calvin, my favorite loser. But of course he doesn’t feel the same. It hurts to actually type that. Life goes [...]

to raise a child.  Well, i honestly don’t know what I should call my dad. For so long I idolized him. He could do no wrong in my eyes. My mom was the reason he left; everything was her fault. Or so I’d perceived. For the divorce in 1996, I blamed her. I didn’t even find [...]